Tag Archives: writing

Let’s talk about fear…

It’s not easy to admit when you’re afraid. Especially as a dude of a certain age because we’ve been taught our whole fucking lives that, essentially, fear is for pussies. And being a pussy is bad (but hey, guess what you’re supposed to chase your entire life…) and it was never a term of endearment growing up. Nowadays I have a vastly different take on a pussy’s strength and, sure, call me a pussy. It’s quite a compliment.

BUT, I’m getting slightly off track with the above. The topic is fear, and that’s what I face most days when I think about writing. I’ve been doing that thinking a lot in the last month or so, now that things are semi-calm again.

Let’s back up a bit, though. Towards the end of 2016 and throughout 2017, I came to an understanding that things weren’t right in my writing career. I’m not going into what those things were, but they put me into my tailspin and coupled with all the stress from trying to move, brought on a great big “fuck it” attitude. A seriously serious “fuck this shit” mindset that lasted from about September of 2016 to November of 2017. I wasn’t afraid of anything in 2017; I was just straight pissed off and last year, I probably didn’t top 5,000 total words… and a solid 3,500 of those were for a single episode of The Lift podcast, and those were written only because Dan Foytik of 9th Story Studios has superhuman patience and my undying respect for the quality of work he does and the passion he brings to the art of storytelling. How could I not say yes to that dude? Continue reading

The Sound of Silence

Hey Brownies… so, yeah, it’s been exactly one year since my last post on this website. That’s one hell of a dry spell and, quite frankly, I’m not sure where to start again. 2017 was crazy for me on a personal level… got a promotion at the day job in April, 3rd grandbaby born in May, and also in May I moved to Missouri to begin searching for houses. Of course, through all that, the wife and I were working on our house in Ohio, getting it “sale ready” and that meant steady attention to some minor things.

Then in June we sold our house and bought a new one. July saw a mad scramble to get the rest of our stuff packed and ready to move. Happily, that happened without a hitch thanks to some mega-awesome motherfuckers I know. Seriously, they know who they are and they have my gratitude. July 21 through August 1 was moving week… yes, week… we moved some 550 miles across the country… and at times me, my wife, and our kids were in three different states. It was rough and nuts and, well, all in all, it was an intensely busy first half of the year and something had to give.

My writing (and this website) were what gave.

Sure, I could have written and kept posts going while busy (let’s face it, the end of 2016 was a ramp up to the start of 2017 and was nuts, too), but there are some things in this writing gig that threw me for a loop. These realizations were bad for me, but coupled with my other stress, I just said “fuck it” and let the funk drown me. I ain’t one to talk shit out of shop and I’m not going into any details, needless to say it was a bummer and it took me some time to get my shit right again. It’s still not quite there, but it’s a whole lot better than it was, and a lot of that is simply because the other stress in my life has lessened. It’s not gone, mind you, just less.

I usually start the new year with a movies and books post… like, in 2016 I read 22 books and watched an embarrassing amount of movies. In 2017… I read 6 books and only caught a couple dozen movies. I was busy, you know?

I feel like John  Wick now, though. “People keep asking if I’m back… and I haven’t really had an answer. But now, yeah, I’m thinking I’m back!”

This year we’re going to get into everything. Politics, religion, sex, writing, alcohol, and everything else.. fuck it. I used to shy away from these topics… you know, don’t talk about these hot buttons and all that, don’t want to alienate readers. Well, I have to have readers to alienate them, and since I don’t, I’m gonna talk about and say whatever I want.