So, Name Your Car Day is actually a thing.
I don’t know if I have words for this. That’s not true. I do have words, but I’m not sure how appropriate they’ll be. Part of me wants to look for a “Name Your Penis Day” or something, just to see if there is one, but I’m refraining. I only look a few days ahead (sometimes a week or two) for these, so I’m hopeful. That would make perfect sense, though.
This kind of goes along with our fascination for things, how we put so much emphasis on objects. I can understand that, believe me. I’ve got the big screen television, the surround sound system, and let’s face it, there’s like five Xboxes in my house (six if you count the Xbox One). So, see, I’m not just a prick writing about this stuff because I think I’m above it, or better than anyone else.
And yes, I’ve even named my cars. But, to be fair, I didn’t do it on 10/02 every time, and every one of them has been named Betsy. From the ’78 Monte Carlo in my youth to the ’02 Dodge Caravan my wife and I still own. Even the newest car, our Sonata, has been christened Betsy. My wife, well, she has other names for the cars, but there’s no rule that says we have to call them the same thing. It’s not like they’re our kids or anything.
So, if you haven’t named your car yet, then today is the right day to do it. If you have named your car, check out the link above and be sure you’ve followed the naming conventions. Cars, obviously, care what you call them. Remember than the next time you’re punching yours, yelling, “C’mon, motherfucker, don’t die on me!”