So, here we are at the start of yet another new year. I suppose this is where I’m supposed to talk about all the shit I did last year and all the shit I’m going to do this year… but, nah. Old hat. Tired.
And let’s face it, 2018 sucked for a lot of us. Personally, politically, financially, religiously… the only thing to really say is “Congrats, you made it!”
For me, I didn’t read enough books (only 16), I watched too many movies (about 70), and for fuck’s sake, I started playing Fortnite. I blame my kids for that one, but that’s because it’s easy.
2019… all any of us can do is try to be better, right?
So, I’m in the process of setting up a signing at a local place and I’ve come to realize how out of things I have been, and still am.
Go from sending an email on that to looking at this WIP, and see all the flaws and errors and the shit that it is, and all I can do is give my laptop the finger. So, that’s what I do. Two of them, in fact. One from each hand.
Some old lady sitting near me at Panera cracked up and said, “I hate technology, too.”
She gave me a knowing smile and went back to her coffee and.
But we all know it’s not the technology that vexes me. A lot of it is this… and I’m taking this from the NaNo pep talk email from Min Jin Lee because it’s true and I have to get over it… “You better believe I wanted to have some respectability in my books. Consequently, in all my drafts, you could tell I was trying to garner praise, and my work suffered for it.”
I don’t know, Brownies, but I think that is what’s left nagging at my writer brain. It’s certainly the editor part of me, trying to correct everything as I go, but it’s also something greater than that. It’s not about money or being rich/famous, but definitely to not be thought of as a shit writer, a hack, someone who can’t get it done (when I actually do get it done).