WTF of the Week

invoicewtfSo, this kid decided to spend time with his grandparents as opposed to some snotty kid’s party and got billed for it, since he RSVPed and didn’t show. Why am I calling this kid snotty? Well, any parent that bills another parent for RSVPing and not showing to a birthday party is a twat and their kids will undoubtedly grow up to be snots. That’s just my opinion, of course, and you are free to disagree. You can read the full article here, and there’s even a video to watch. Now, this happened a few days ago and I’m going to file it under my “WTF” for the week. The sad thing is that I’ll probably have another “WTF” in just a few days because we sure do like to fuck with each other.

At any rate, let’s examine this for just a moment. A mother sets up a party at this place where she probably pays per person that shows up. Pretty standard. This kid RSVPs, doesn’t show, so she paid for him and she in turn bills the no-show kid’s parents. The article isn’t clear whether or not this codicil was on the party invite, but the wording makes it seem likely. But even so, who puts that on the invitation in the first place? And if so, do you make exceptions for accident, illness, or death? Or does the flat fee apply regardless of the reason for the absence?

I have kids, two boys, and we generally do their parties at a central Ohio pizza chain or our house. We ask for RSVPs simply because if I have 15 kids coming (with 1-2 adults apiece), that’s a minimum of around 30 people I need food and drink for, plus prize bags and what other shit my wife plans. Now, let’s say I get a count of 30 and I order enough pizza for that many people at two slices each (and that ain’t cheap, Brownies), and then only half show up. I have a lot of leftover shit, man. It would never enter my mind to invoice these parents their two slices of pizza, three cups of pop, and goodie bags. It just seems petty. Though, at one point, the father here says “She didn’t treat me like a human being, she treated me like a child…”

Uh, asshole, kids are human beings…

Maybe you should pay her. Maybe she isn’t billing for a human missing a party, but kennel space for whatever species that little creature sitting next to you really is… I mean, that’s fair, right?

At any rate, dad should have said “Hey, not gonna make it…” There is, though, some disagreement as to whether or not the dad had the other parent’s digits. I figure he did, at one point, and tossed them. Or maybe he just didn’t care, didn’t think it’d matter?

Brownies, what are your thoughts? Was she right or wrong to bill this parent? Hit me up in the comments!

Let’s talk about that Hasbro penis…

hasbropenisAnd by talk, I actually mean ask what in the actual fuck is going on with this thing? And that questions is for both parents and Hasbro.

I don’t know, it certainly looks like a penis, one ribbed for pleasure, but I have to ask myself what parent worries about that when giving age-appropriate toys to their kids? Seriously, let’s talk like adults for a minute … I open this package for my five year old and I see this “extractor” (hey, at least they didn’t call it the intruder), my first thought isn’t, “Oh my God, Billy’s going to think this is a dick! I must complain and rant and rave about phallic symbols masquerading as children’s toys!”

No. I may think it looks like a dick, and I’d probably snicker and make rude gestures with it at my wife when the kid isn’t looking, but I’m not too concerned he’s going to connect the dots that this giant toy resembles a penis. Just like when he brings me “The Little Mermaid,” it’s not because he’s looking at the cover going, “Daddy, daddy, look … it’s a dick!”

People, your kids don’t care. And frankly, unless the dick is an actual dick and it’s doing something perverted that a young child shouldn’t see, why make a huge deal out of it? Cuz you know, now, every pre-teen and teen with a smartphone, tablet, or iPod knows you’re ridiculous and you think this thing looks like a cock, when, usually, they wouldn’t give Play-Doh a second glance. Well played, mom and dad, well played.

Or what I really want to say is, “For a society that abhors sex more than anything you people see dicks and pussies everywhere!” Repressed much?

And Hasbro, let’s face it, it’s called QUALITY CONTROL. Get some.